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Friday, January 13, 2012

DAY 6 OF THE DANIEL FAST

Today has been a really hard day for me. I think the hunger is setting in and this is the time where I need to draw closer to the Lord. It doesn't help that the smell of biscuits, gravy and eggs were pouring out of my kitchen this morning thanks to other people in my home who aren't on the fast with me. I came to my room and just cried for a bit this morning. I just pray that all of this self discipline is worth it. Lord, save my family, heal my husband and help us with our finances, please! If even one of those miracles happen (which I believe it will), my heart will be overcome with so much joy. But then again, if it's not the Lord's timing, I will wait and still be happy, knowing that He has made me victorious and that He hears my cries and He loves me unconditionally.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

OUR "LAST SUPPER"


This is how my husband and I ended our last night before the fast! We had a nice big steak, loaded baked potato and mac and cheese. He also had a salad and we both topped it off with caffeinated pop. I also stuffed myself with different kinds of chocolate throughout the day. I sure felt like a queen...until later in the evening when my belly started aching. I really wish I had gone just a bit lighter on the junk!

But, today is a new day, praise the Lord and the fast has begun. It is almost midnight on the first night of the fast and I have to say that since I have done this one other time, it has made this time just slightly easier. You learn by doing and I learned a lot from last year. I absolutely must keep drinking water. It helps me to feel full and it flushes out the toxins faster. Last year I had a horrible headache for 3 days. This time around (aside from the one pop I had the night before), I went the four days leading up to the fast without caffeine. I have had a headache for most of today, but it's been bearable and I don't expect it to be there tomorrow.

I hope that someone out there finds this blog and it just helps to encourage them. I'm reading Jentezen Franklin's book, "Fasting". I couldn't put it down tonight. If you've never heard of Jentezen Franklin, please check out his website, http://www.jentezenfranklin.org/fasting/ (this is obviously the page for fasting). His videos and notes have been so uplifting to me during this time. Well, day one went well and I'm expecting great things from the Lord. I'll write more about that later. Be blessed!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

DANIEL FAST

Tomorrow marks the first day of the Daniel Fast. With this particular fast, the only things we are allowed to eat are fruits, vegetables, and nuts. We also only drink water. This is a 21 day fast that we are doing alongside many members and leaders of our church. This will be mine and my husband's second year, and let me tell you that last year was extremely hard for me, but my testimony is even greater!

My main prayer focus last year was that I my relationship with my brother would be restored. I hadn't heard from him in about a year and a half. I had no idea where he was living or how he was doing. My heart was very heavy burdened. Only a couple of days after my husband and I decided that we would partake in the fast, the miracles had already begun. I received a telephone call and I thought it was my nephew. "Happy New Year". I quickly said back to him, "Happy New Year". Then it dawned on me...this wasn't my nephew. I said, "Who is this?". The voice on the other line said, "This is your brother". I was speechless. In an instant, our relationship had been restored and he even came and stayed with us for a couple of weeks.

Another wonderful thing that happened is that 2011 was overall, our healthiest year as a family. If you are in need of healing, I would highly recommend this Daniel Fast. Did we receive all the miracles and healing that we were praying for? No. But, the ones that didn't happen last year, we are believing God to take care of them this year. Here's what did happen though; Towards the end of the year, I had my best month ever in my business. There were NO stomach bugs or strep throat in our home. My 12 year old didn't have to go to the doctor at all for the entire year. Also at the end of the year, my mother and her sister started talking again for the first time in 8 years!

A couple of healing miracles took place within my own body. I was healed from some mysterious thing that had been happening to me for about a year and a half. My head and side of my face would go numb and the numbness would run down my left arm, into my hand. My body would also shake uncontrollably for hours and hours. I had gone to the hospital at least 3 times in fear of having a heart attack or stroke. This last happened in June of 2011. I had a church friend come over and pray for me and I knew in that instant that God had healed me from this terrible thing.

I have also battled with depression most of my life. I had terrible postpartum depression after my second child was born. It took a long time for me to recognize that this wasn't just postpartum depression anymore. It had been 3 years since my son's birth and I still walked around in a fog about 4 or 5 days out of the week. I was just so overwhelmed by life. There were times when I just wanted to die. The only thing that kept me from following through with thoughts of killing myself, was thinking about my sons. I couldn't leave them without a mommy. Finally I realized that I wasn't really being much of a mommy for them. I was distant, sad, overwhelmed and easily angered. So one day, I went to the doctor and began taking 2 different types of medication, one of them was also to help with headaches I was getting on a daily basis and the other was for depression. Within a couple of weeks, I could really tell a difference. I was sleeping better, felt better about life and wasn't having headaches everyday.

It was great being on the medication, but I'm not the kind of person who wants to be on medication, so I began to pray about it. The Lord began to convict me that I needed to put full trust in Him and He would heal me completely from depression and the headaches. Then one day I went up to the alter at church to have someone pray and believe with me that the depression would be broken off of my life. About a week or two later, I stopped taking the medication. I didn't even tell my husband because I wanted to see if anyone noticed a difference. I knew that stopping medication cold turkey could have severe consequences because I had done that before and it turned me into a maniac. But, I was trusting God completely. A couple of weeks off of the medication went by and I told my husband what I had done and asked him for his honest opinion of my behavior for the last week or so. He actually told me that he thought I was doing better off of the medicine than I was doing on it. And people started telling me that I looked great. They had no idea what I had been through. Praise the Lord! I've been medicine free for over 2 months and I feel wonderful. I feel like I have my life back! And the scary headaches I was getting have never come back!

I do attribute all of the healing, financial favor and restored relationships to being obedient to our pastor's call to do a fast and taking this time to fully submit myself to the Lord. The fast is a time when you have to discipline yourself completely and draw closer to the Lord. I love doing it at the beginning of the year and making my prayer focus be things that I am expecting the Lord to do during this year. Even if He didn't do a single thing that I was asking Him for, I love Him the same and I know that He knows best. I praise Him for all that He's done in my life in 2011 and I look forward to seeing how He will use me in 2012.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

MY ONE WORD

 

I've been inspired by another blogger that I follow, "The Generous Wife", to do my New Year resolution differently for 2012. Every year (except for last year, when I was too depressed to think about resolutions) I vowed the same resolutions as many others: loose weight, take control of my money, GET ORGANIZED, etc. But this year, I really like what The Generous Wife has done and that is to find just ONE WORD to become the theme or mission for this year. 

It didn't take long for me to sit in my quiet room to hear the word that the Lord put on my heart. And this is a word that I surely wouldn't have thought of on my own. That word is SURRENDER.

 

I am a woman who likes to have complete control. My husband doesn't even drive when I'm in the car because I don't like the feeling of not having total control. But what the Lord is speaking to my heart again is that because I feel like I always have to be in control, I am not fully trusting Him with my life.

There are many areas of my life where I need to learn to completely surrender to Jesus. Some of those areas are the need for control, fears, finances, relationships and homeschool. I'm really going to work on this. It's going to be baby steps for sure, but at least it will be forward steps.


If you had to pick just one word, what would it be?