Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Winter Blues Already???

Each year my parents head south for the winter. This year they haven't even left and I'm already missing them terribly. They came to visit on Sunday and it's the last time I'll get to see them until the spring. I'm especially having a hard time this year since I'm pregnant. I hate the idea of being pregnant and my mommy being hundreds of miles away from me. I'm also fighting feelings of loneliness and unworthiness. I know these thoughts are not from the Lord, but it's still hard. Sometimes I feel like Jesus is the only one I have to talk to. Which shouldn't be a bad thing. It's also difficult being a stay at home mom where you don't get praise from anyone. And then I'm struggling because I just don't really feel like I'm needed where I love to be the most. I don't want to mention specifically what I'm talking about, but I just know that when I stop being a part of this, it will continue on without me without any problems and I feel like I won't even be missed. I just want to stay inside my home. There's less chance of getting hurt. But doesn't that defeat the whole purpose of loneliness? I wonder how much of these stupid feelings are due to the time change? That seems to bring me down each year. Does anyone else have this issue? 

Sorry that this post is so depressing. It's just what I'm feeling at the moment. I'm a real person and I share it all! I know Jesus will bring me out of it though. Maybe He's put me in this spot so I will draw closer to him. Guess I will get off of the internet and go spend more time with Him. 

Be blessed my friends!

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