Monday, June 4, 2012


I've been doing a lot of searching lately, just trying to figure out God's will for my life. I don't want to be doing anything outside of His will. I've had so much to consider. Should I have another child? Should I wait until next year or try now? After all, we know it's going to happen sooner or later because it was prophesied over us by someone we highly respect. You can't accept part of the prophecy and disregard the rest. My heart was completely closed off to the idea of more children prior to this prophecy. Should I continue homeschooling my children or try public school? Should I continue pressing forward with my business, even though it's proved very challenging for me at times? I wonder if I'd be able to homeschool another child alongside my preschooler? It would be extra income and it would help me stay on a schedule. I write a list out of the pros and cons...the list remains almost completely even because every time I think of a negative, I can come up with a positive. Should I have a room just for my business when we move or would it be good to homeschool in there too? Could I make money blogging? What else could I do to make money? What CAN I do? I can teach, sing, write, sell Scentsy (my direct sales business), or babysit. Hmm...

What do I do God? WHAT should I do?

I weigh the pros and cons.
I consult with my husband night after night.
I ask my closest friends and family.
I read self help books.

And then...I read...His Word! Not like I do each normal morning. I start REALLY studying what He's been trying to tell me all along. I not only read it in my New King James version, but I get out my son's IPod and I start reading it in other translations that make it more real to me, like the Message Bible. I use the dictionary to look up the meanings of words that I want to go deeper with.

And suddenly I start hearing His voice more clearly than ever before. When I read something from a book today, they words just jumped off of the page at me and gave me the confirmation that I needed. It said, "God's will is not something hidden that needs to be found; it is something revealed that waits to be done." What I realized is that God doesn't want me to search out answers for every issue that I think I have right now. He wants me to continue on in the race that I am running; be more diligent with the tasks that He has already placed before me. Matthew 6:34 in the Message Bible says, "Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes." And Hebrews 10:35-36 says, "You were sure of yourself then. It's still a sure thing! But you need to stick it out, staying with God's plan you'll be there for the promised completion". 

Now, I do believe that there are definitely seasons for everything in our lives and somethings must come to an end. But for me, these verses convicted me to stop searching for all the answers and trust that God has already given them to me. I just need to keep pressing forward. I have an amazing business. I have the ability and desire to homeschool and I know that someday I will have another child, whether it's from my womb or from somewhere else. So for now, I will just continue on with what God has blessed me with and if other opportunities arise, then I will seek Him to see if it's a door that I should walk through.

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